Finallly Focused

I have always struggled with my weight. My mom struggled with hers and pretty much every woman on both sides of my family have struggled as well. I say this not as an excuse, but as a little background information. I have known that I needed to lose weight for a while now and have tried in the past to no avail. Not because I couldn't, but because I was never actually focused on it. I knew what I needed to do, but never had the willpower to do it. I would always fail and give in at some point. It was never a lifestyle change, It was never an act of Faith...It was always very prideful and self-confident, although for the life of me, I don't know why since I never succeeded. After I had Bria I lost 30 lbs. It was easy. It just melted away after she was born. It was great, and I was confident. And where I haven't gained any of it back, I haven't lost anymore either. I keep saying, "I need to get more focused on my diet" or "I need to watch what I eat" or other things, but I never actually committed to do anything. To be honest, I really had NO idea what the nutritional value of most of the foods I ate were. Last Saturday It hit me and I knew I had to change. In our cell groups at church we are doing a study on "Life's Healing Choices: Freedom from your hurts, habits, and hangups" and last week (or was it two weeks ago) in the study the Rick Warren made a statement that willpower should be called won'tpower...cheesy I know, but his point was that we CANNOT change our own lives. We need to relinquish control of our lives and count on God for strength to get over what we are struggling with. Wow, I tell Mary Kate all the time that she is a "can-do kid," that she CAN DO all things through Christ who gives her strength and if she is struggling with something, she should ask him for help and trust that he will help her. I obviously will help her too, but I want her to receive her confidence from Him! So why don't I listen to my own advice. I need to trust him to give me the strength to change my lifestyle and set a positive example for my children. So, I signed up for Sparkpeople, It is a website that helps you reach your weightloss goals by encouraging healthy living and helping you track your food consumption and activities. I started this on Sunday and I have been overwhelmed by the change that has occurred in my mind already. It is like all of a sudden I don't even want to eat the things I used to eat or drink. I have been eating a 1200-1500 calorie diet balanced 30-30-40 for carbs-fat-protein since Sunday morning. I have lost 4 pounds. I am hesitant to get excited about this, but I am excited. I have never been focused like this before. I know it is because I am depending on Christ to change not only my physical appearance, but my heart and mind towards food. I am trusting him to help me change my lifestyle and make me and my family more healthy. Pray for me to stay focused and trust God during this time as I seek freedom from this habit/hangup/unhealthy lifestyle. I will try to keep posting about my progress!